Brown Recluse

from Fear Love by Not Caleb

	/

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about

I was thinking about humanity and how the closer we get to the meaning of life, the more sad and depressed we are. i feel like my brother Josh is that way. He is so smart and giving, but also really sad and suicidal. He's a recluse. So i came up with this story about how I am the suicidal one and my only company is this brown recluse in the corner of my room. i end up letting the spider bite me because i want to escape the shackles or mortality and in doing so, i am reincarnated as that same spider, alone.

lyrics

Wake up
Same stuff
Same room
Same you

There's a spider
in the corner of my eye
Brown recluse, you saved me

It only seems much worse
when i think about how far i am from home
wondering if anyone
will miss me when i'm gone

I'm a spider
in the corner of my room
brown recluse, i am you

curl up
wait for
its bite
to kill me

i don't want to spend my whole life
spinning web with nothing inside

there's a spider in the corner of my eye
brown recluse
you saved me
i'm a spider
in the corner of my room
brown recluse, i am you

wake up
same stuff
same room
same you

credits

from Fear Love, released August 12, 2018

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about

Not Caleb Portland, Oregon

Silly Songs With Larry cover band

Emo Singer-Songwriter Portland, OR

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